This is a peek/recap of some of the moments that I have had this year and what I have learned from them. I decided to be as raw and real to you as I can because the reality is that my life is not perfect. I am constantly learning to improve upon myself. If I one day achieve this so-called "perfection," I will definitely make sure to let you in on the secret. Until then, here is a long and very honest post about life. Hopefully, you can take these life lessons and learn something from it! :)

1. Learn to handle rejection.
Rejection is not easy. From college rejection letters to an unexpected turn in one of my relationships, I have found that rejection has become easier to swallow. I take rejection as a sign. Sometimes, things are not meant to be. Just because you did not get your "dream" intern position does not mean that you are not worthy of a successful and prosperous future. Rejection can also be taken as a critique. Maybe you did not match the standard. If you are driven, eventually, you will get what you deserve. I have learned to take what I get and improve upon myself. Don't let rejection get you down!

2. Stay true to yourself.
I consider myself a people pleaser. I am constantly trying to appease people so that I could feel accepted. Being in college, I learned that the best "mask" to put on is to just be me. People who judge you for "being yourself" is not worthy of your time. I am constantly learning new things about myself and discovering new interests. I have to say, college has definitely changed me. I have become a person that I truly love. This new version of Emily is great!

3. Be adventurous.
Growing up, I have always been timid and scared. I like to stay in my bubble. I don't like doing risky things that push me outside of my comfort zone. Perhaps it is due to my very sheltered upbringing, but I am always scared of taking risks. Going into college, I realized that being spontaneous and adventurous can actually be a good thing. But spontaneity has its limits. This year, I managed to accomplish so many things that I could never have imagined completing at the beginning of the year. These moments can only be credited to my adventurous and curious nature.

4. Have a severe case of FOMO.
Similar to #3, I have learned to really put myself out there and try new things. From attending my first frat party to going on my first crazy rollercoaster, I have learned new things about myself. For example, I have learned that I do not like frat parties at all. LOL. However, I have learned that I LOVE rollercoasters. I used to hate them, but after going on several coasters this year, it is my favorite thing EVER. I have always made excuses to flake out of things, but this year, I went for it. If I had said no to all of these moments, I would not have discovered these new interests!

5. Things are not complicated unless you make it complicated.
I guess I had always had this dream that things would work out one day between me and a particular boy. I had always labelled this relationship "complicated" because I constantly told myself that this was a one-sided relationship. In the four years of high school that we had together, I had fallen so hard for him that I don't think anything could have changed the way I felt about him. Even after spending the majority of the summer apart and living miles away from him, he would still be on my mind. I know now that I should have told him a lot sooner. I should have told him the moment I got an inkling of a feeling for him. I should have nipped these feelings in the bud before it metastasized. I should have just been honest to him and myself. I should have jumped the gun and take away the "complicated" label. It really isn't complicated.

6. Prioritize.
Time. It seems like we can't get enough of it when we need it. I always feel like it is a struggle to manage my time wisely. Prioritizing has become a very necessary skill in college. If I want to do something, I have to allot some time for it. You can always make excuses about how you aren't able to do something that you wanted to get done. At the end of the day, your failures mostly fall upon your shoulders. If you want to succeed, you have to effectively work for it. Never would I have thought I would become a crazy planner person. Planning out my day really helps me stick to a schedule to get things done. Because of my meticulous planning, I always have leftover time to do the things I want.

7. Pain is only temporary.
Have you ever felt this sense of utter hopelessness? A feeling where you are completely lost and confused? At the beginning of this year, I had honestly felt like no matter how hard I tried, things would not go my way. However, pain from heartbreak or rejection is short lived. Moving on may not be easy at first, but it will eventually get better. Remember -- the only constant in life is change.

8. Live in the moment.
Sometimes, it's good to put your phone down for a while and just take in the world as a whole. I believe that some of my happiest memories of 2017 is when I made an effort to be as present as I could with the people around me and my surroundings. Your phone may capture the memories, but memories are not worth capturing if you are not having loads of fun! So, always remember to take a moment to put the phone down and engage.

9. Step out of your comfort zone.
I have learned to take a lot of chances in the first few months of college. You never know if you will come across a new hobby that you thoroughly enjoy. One such hobby that I came across in college is yoga. I had never really considered yoga exercise, but when I spontaneously decided to show up for a yoga class, I fell in love. Yoga was extremely fun and I loved everything about it. If I had chosen to stay in my dorm room, I might not have had the chance to pick up this new hobby. Another example in which I stepped outside of my comfort zone was to go to an event alone. My school had offered to take any student who was interested to the Griffith Observatory. This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and I have always wanted to experience Griffith Observatory. None of my college friends could make it, but I decided that I was going to go anyways. It was tons of fun. Even though I originally went alone, I made two new friends from that experience. It was truly memorable and definitely worthwhile.

10. Practice self love.
College is drastically different from high school. The culture is different, the workload is harder, and the stress is at an all time high. Despite all of this, it is important to practice self care. Sometimes things can get really rough, but that doesn't mean that you should skip dinners to finish an assignment. I have learned to love myself and value my health which is why I cannot stress how important it is to continuously take care of yourself and measure your level of happiness.

11. Make time for the things you love.
If you haven't noticed, I have been on a 3 month hiatus of no posts on this blog because of school. I have constantly pushed aside blogging because I always felt like it wasn't a big priority in my life. However, blogging brings me great joy and I truly miss it. I would really like to continue this hobby for a long time, so I definitely need to carve out some time for it!

12. Keep good habits.
Recently, I have practiced a lot of reading, journaling, meditation and yoga. Hobbies like these have helped me stop scrolling through my phone for hours and timidly waiting for a text from a special someone. I have been able to release a lot of negative energy in my life with these various outlets and I think each activity has affected my life in a positive manner. With these new habits that I keep up in my life, I have managed to keep my mind clear of negative thoughts. My college friends have always commented on my bubbly optimistic personality and its because I am truly happy. While most college students seem to always be unhappy and stressed, I feel like I have managed to keep a very healthy lifestyle -- a balance between me time and work. I am truly happy when I get to do the things I love!

13. Work for your relationships.
Relationships are important. Going to college, I have learned that there are some friends that I still want to have in my life. And others that I have no interest in staying in touch with. In college, a social life does not come to you as easily as it does in high school. You can't simply expect that people will want to be friends with you. You actually have to make the effort. You have to put yourself out there to make friends and find your niche. The relationships you work the hardest for are the ones that are worth keeping.

14. It's okay to cry.
I am not much of a crying person. I do not consider myself an "emotional" person. In fact, I usually like to dodge feelings. My emotions are my own personal business and I do not like putting people in an awkward position where they would have to comfort me. Often times, when I am upset, disappointed, or sad, I burst into laughter. I am not entirely sure what is the reason behind it, but for some reason I find pain (when someone/something hurts me) unbearingly funny. 2017 was a different year for me. I cried. A LOT. I cried when a guy bailed on me the day before a dance. I cried when I got my first acceptance letter to college. I cried when I felt stressed and overwhelmed. I cried when I retired from my term as Lieutenant Governor. I cried because I was homesick and my parents would continuously trigger sad emotions whenever they said "I miss you." I cried when I was unhappy. I cried when I missed people from back home. I cried when I felt alone. I cried when I felt an overwhelming amount of joy. I was an "emotional basketcase." But sometimes, crying is just what you need to dump everything out. Whether it's a celebratory cry or a sad cry, it does not make you weak to shed a tear every once in a while.

15. Work for what you want.
I had this dream sophomore year to host a dance that would raise money for a children's hospital. Because I had a friend who was the ASB treasurer for some time, I knew a lot about dances and how much the school makes from ticket sales. When I had come up with this idea as a sophomore, my friends told me it was unfeasible and that I should ditch the dream. I always had it on the back of my mind. Senior year was the year I finally took charge and made those dreams a reality. Even if the dance was not a success, I would still learn from the experience. I was willing to take the risks because the rewards seemed far greater. For weeks and weeks, I had dedicated a lot of time to working on this dance. Eventually, my hard work paid off. I managed to raise over $2000 for the Pediatric Trauma Program which benefits children's hospitals in California, Nevada, and Hawaii. It was an unforgettable night and I will never forget the feeling of achieving a dream that I had always thought was "impossible."

16. Build bridges, don't burn them.
In 2016, I burned a lot of bridges. I wasn't too proud of that. There were a lot of relationships that I had with some of my friends that I lost. 2017 was the year I built new ones with new friends and mended the relationships I had with the old ones. Regardless of the circumstances of how we ended things, I am extremely happy about the current state that I am in. Repairing all of my relationships and creating new ones has helped me become a better person. While my old relationships are not like what they used to be, I have buried the hatchet with many of my "enemies" (it's a harsh word, but I couldn't think of an alternative) and learned to open up my heart to all types of people in my life (even the ones that I am not particularly fond of). When the time comes and I die, I want to be able to die knowing that I do not have bad blood with anyone.

17. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.
You realize which people you really love and care about when you move far away from home. I learned the value that each of my close friends and family have on my life by how much I miss them. Starting a new chapter does not mean that you forget the rest of the book. Those memories stay with you forever. I have decided to share with you a message that I had sent to my high school friends the day I moved into college.

"As I embark on this new chapter of my life, I know that I am not entirely alone. Each of you have rubbed off on me in some way. Nimo's kindness. Wil's curiosity. Anna's humor. Maisha's spirit. Emon's warmth. Nina's aesthetic. Jill's laugh. Emma's creativity. Diego's sass. Saje's generosity. Naehu's strength. Dylan's hugs. Teagan's smile. There will never be a time where I feel like I am truly alone. So thank you. You make me feel really really lucky."

Thank you for being such great readers. Here is to an exciting new year filled with more lessons to learn, great memories, and amazing people! I cannot wait to share more quality content and improve upon this blog this year. Goodbye 2017, hello 2018.